DEATH Mannequin;

Friday, March 14, 2008

If you're reading this, I just want to say that I miss you.

I think of you every night and day, and there's nothing that can stop me from loving you.

I wish you were here to share my joys

And sorrows

I miss you so much

I love you, baby

It's been... 3 years?? since I last saw you

i hope we'll meet again

I would never hurt you

I LOVE YOU babes

Or did you come
to stare or wash away the BLOOD?

Monday, February 11, 2008

I see her staring at me
And she looks at me with a blank expression
I want to be her, I want to be her

I see her staring at me
And she looks at me, eyes wide open
I want to be her, I want to be her

She smiles and gives me a nod
I gulp and look away
Why can't I act like her, why can't I?

I smile and give her a nod
She just stares and looks away coolly
Why can't I act like her, why can't I?

She raises her eyebrows and walks away
I almost call out to her but don't
why doesn't she like me, why doesn't she?

I raise my eyebrows and feel too intimidated-
I walk away slowly while she just stands there smirking
Why doesn't she like me, why doesn't she like me?

And after walking a few steps further
I turn around and see her there

And after deciding to move on,
I feel her presence still and turn around,
Only to find her there

She has that smirk on her face

She has a frown on hers

She walks towards me

She walks towards me

Slowly,

Deliberately,

SUREly,

CONFIDENTLy,

SMASH!!!!

The glass mirror shatters into a million pieces,

And I see her there no more.

This is my first try at a new-style poem. It's basically about a girl, who's looking into a mirror and interpreting her own self in two different ways. No, its not two different girls.
And after a lot of doubt and self-consciousness and self-hatred, she finally decides to smash the mirror, but gains nothing from it.

Pretty sad, actually.

Or did you come
to stare or wash away the BLOOD?

Monday, January 21, 2008

To be on the edge of breaking down.

I'M SICK.
YES.
A DAY BEFORE OBS AND I'M SICK.

So I'm in the same group with Jeanna, Kristen, probably Deep, Grace (LABBPARTNER!) and Nabilah, Yim Qi, Khaleedah, Sarah.... and don't kill me if I don't remember all your names!

I don't feel too good now but I have to be strong. For OBS. Hahaha.

I went shopping with Sharon and bought eye-candy bronze sandals that look great on her skin colour. It's not really my type of shoewear- my sandals were brought from a designer sale in Malaysia for a rip-off 10RM (5 SD). They're strappy, black, and look great paired with skinnies.

Sharon's pair of sandals, however...
Bronze with a bit of bling on the side of the strap, has a higher sole than mine, would look great paired with shorts, and cost close to 40 Sing dollars.

Talk about a difference in opinion.

but we did agree on a pair of totally hip thin-material hoodie long-sleeved shirt which I have been trying to find like, forever. It's totally figure-hugging and the green shirt is a little tight. Well. It IS the smallest size. I suppose I should have gotten an S.

My grey hoodie looks awesome when worn with my 3/4 track pants, one with white lining and the other with pink. It's really cheap, too, at the original price of $20. Turns out dear Sharon knows the owner of the shop and managed to get a discount of $2 for me. YAYYY. (:

Natalie is reluctant to go to OBS coz she won't be in the same group as me. I feel your pain, girl.

I sent breek on an errand to buy disposable panties for me. And she was like... whattttt?????

okay, that pretty much describes my adventure-filled day.
Can't wait for obs...only a few more hours to go...

Though the diseased part of me just wants to stay home and go ice-skating with breek while ya'll gone.

Sniff sniff.

have fun siaw ee....

WITHOUT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe.

XD.

Or did you come
to stare or wash away the BLOOD?

Thursday, January 17, 2008

the commonness of bullshit.

BULLSHIT
BULLSHIT
BULLSHIT

BUUUUULLLLLSHHHHIIIIITTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!

That was the only thing that registered into my mind during the BS talk with the crothers and her bimbotic yes-man. As amusing as it was for me, (for I was forcibly reminded of LEIGH MCDONALD-gag gag, it wasn't so much for deep and shar. Relax.

oh well. I suppose i'd have to change my social subject thingy.

Hmm. UHH. Nat may never forgive me for saying this... so I shall not.
(haha! Cliffhanger. Don't u just hate it when ppl do thaatt??)

kayy. i've got nothing to blog about.

APER SAL NGAN KAU SEMUA????
NAPER KAU TAK BILANG AKU SIUULLL???
APER SAL NGAN KAUU???
WAH KANINA SEYYYHH.

MACAM MYSTERIOUS.

practising my non-existent malay.

DDEEENNNYYYY. SStt.

Or did you come
to stare or wash away the BLOOD?

Friday, January 11, 2008

Stay Awake.

The tentative Stay Awake lyrics. The song hurts and nearly moved me to tears.

Say, the lights are really low enough to play,
Would you cast yourself so solitary?
All alone you prove that I was,
Broken down to move and alright,
Battling the loss you live for,
Meant the world to you,

And would you stay right here?
When I tell you,
That someone out there loves you.
Would you stay right here?
Well I'd tell you,
That someone out there loves you after all.

Sometimes it's always easier at fall,
Then you pick yourself right back and better,
All alone you prove that I was,
Broken down to move and alright,
And if you're walking out the door I'd stop you
Battling the loss you live for,
Now turn to me and I'd say this

And would you stay right here?
When I tell you,
That someone out there loves you.
If you stay right here,
Keep attacking you,
That someone out there loves you.

Is there no one, no one out there?
Is there no one who, no one who cares?
And if no one. no one out there?
Is there no one who, no one who cares?

And would you decimate these thoughts
When you go?

And if you stay right here,
When I tell you,
That someone out there loves you.
Stay right here,
Keep attacking you,
That someone out there loves you.

No one, no one out there,
Is there no one who, no one who cares?
And if no one, no one out there,
Is there no one who, no one who cares?

A song about love, about hope.

Someone out there loves you after all.

Apparently the song is supposed to lift MCR's fan's spirits up. As quoted by an article;

"it's about someone thinking of killing themselves but the speaker (Gerard?) is convincing them not to "stay right here" because someone out there loves them."

And then of course there's the internal struggle, which has been caught perfectly in the song. "is there no one who, no one who cares?" Gerard is trying to say that, however much you feel unloved, someone loves you or is thinking of you. He's also warning his fans :"Would you cast yourself so solitary?" He's asking us whether death is worth it, to condemn ourselves to eternal solitude.

can't wait for the record to come out.

MCR I love you.

Or did you come
to stare or wash away the BLOOD?

Thursday, January 10, 2008

I'd hate you, but the problem is...

Don't FLAME MCR.

I REPEAT,

DON'T FLAME MCR.

I love them so much.

It was many many years ago,
In a labyrinth by the fence,
Lived a saviour by the name of My Chemical Romance.

He made quilts for the poor so they could stay warm,
He made spectacles for the blind so they could see,
But how unfair to think that
Their saviours are still wandering about aimlessly?

To be continued...

Or did you come
to stare or wash away the BLOOD?

Monday, January 7, 2008

DENY.

School has definitely taken a turn for the better for me.

Who could go wrong with a class full of dramaians?

But strangely enough, that's where I see the absolute IRONY of the matter. For a class with the drama geeks inside, I see no DRAMA unfolding. But don't get me wrong, school has been far more enjoyable than ever but where's the fun in life without the little troubles we get in and the bitchy fights we either love to watch or get involved in??

School has been all about studying now, and I suppose Sec 4 will be 50x worse. I'm actually managing to keep up with my studies...which very oddly disturbs me. School has been falling into a daily routine, an elegant dish served everyday with no extra sugar or salt to go with it.

Using wit to backfire all comments and concentrating on learning the notes of "Disenchanted" are the few perks, but like every single latest fad of mine, it comes and goes, and the interest wanes. However I MAY stick to the piano because it exercises the right brain extremely well and I'm gonna need the brain fluids of imagination to fuel me to shake up even the most mundane things.

But the bottom line is, school is getting pretty BORRIINNGGG.

Boring as in, to the point that I'm beginning to find homework enjoyable and I revel in the fact when someone speaks in the hopeless hope that I can actually process something interesting.

And when a girl like me starts doing homework,

It means it's time to spice life up.

DEEENNNYYYY. ;D

Or did you come
to stare or wash away the BLOOD?

Meeting My Chemical Romance- What they'll do...
Name
DOB
Favourite Color
Gerard will....	Hate you at first then he thinks hes in love with you
Frank will....	ask you for your phone number
Mikey will....	push you out a second story window
Ray will....	Drag you in his room and have kinky sex with you
Bob will....	Ignore you

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