So... yes..

I was so beat yesterday after Drama SYF I slept in the bus. Sheesh. Such degradation. Slept as in, I treated the chairs like my bed. HAHAHAHA. ha. SO when I got home I started doing my erm...my erm... my.. tuition homework...hmm. I can't remember. I was doing SOMETHING. Then I have absolutely NO IDEA what the HELL happened to me...but I started to dream a fabulously mixed-up dream. I dreamt... ( or visioned, really...it felt so real...) that MCR came to visit me. Nothing surprising about that...they've been doing it a lot lately. So we were in a coffeeshop. I was pissed because I didn't get to see their concert...and I found them in a coffeeshop. I mean, a COFFEESHOP???? And then they saw me and walked towards me. Then we watched 2 girls in TKGS uniforms eating nearby. Frank(second guitarist) seemed to read my mind and then we went to kill the two girls. Uhhh.....yeah. We killed them. No no...more like TORTURED them. We used a variety of different everyday tools...like wenches, pens, knives, the coffee table... umm. No one seemed to see us doing the deed. So when they died, they were totally UNRECOGNISABLE. Haha. I felt a sense of power when I killed them. Like 'HAH see who won now???' kind of thing. The rest of the band ran away when we killed them coz they don't like the idea of revenge. Even if they do sing about it, they only write songs about it coz they want ppl to know what the consequences will be if you do it. Anyway, killing IS extreme. I guess through this ...dream... I found Frank's true identity. And it's kinda true coz I watched a vid yesterdae...AFTER THE DREAM...and Frank was a little pissed at his fans coz they were selfish and hogging him like... and they didn't allow the rest to see him. So yeah. I guess there's more to Frank than we know.

So after the double murder we buried their bodies in the field, together with the blood-stained murder weapons. Everything was happy for a while. Then one day, the band left for their tour. Suddenly. They didn't even say goodbye. the next day I saw a yellow-machine-like thingy digging up the fields. I knew that their bodies would have rotted, but I was concerned about the bloody weapons. Then Clarissa CLARISSA?!?!?! went up to me and she was like...'hanis haha hanis we've never heard anything from that band that you like... where do you think they've gone??? I pity you...you've never met them before.' So I said yes, I've met them before. But she didn't believe me. So I said that we've killed two girls from TKGS. Uhhh...she still didn't belive me. So I dug up one of the murder weapons--a wench. It was blood-stained and all. For some weird reason the blood hasn't dried. Then Clarissa looked scared and all, and I, the lunatic, was waving the wench around, and told Clar that if she were to tell on me, I would kill her. But then her face cleared, and she said that I wouldn't DARE kill her. And i said..'wanna bet?' And she said... 'I know you won't kill me coz when you killed those two girls, you were with a band. Without them, you'll be nothing.'

At that point of time I sorta woke up on my bed...hmm... I don't remember going to bed that night...such was my mind. And then I remembered that line Clar said..."Without them...you'll be nothing." I guess that's true. Then, in the wee hours of the morning... it was 4.30 am, I remember, coz i looked at the clock....I asked MCR why they left me that night. So erm, if you were to see me that mornin, you would think I'm a mental escapee. escapee...so there's such thing as an escaper??? And then they told me...shit I can't remember what they told me...oh yeah. They said that I was stressed that day, so they wanted to make me feel in control again. By murder. I smiled, remembering the blood and screams. So I guess MCR DID do me a favor. then I asked about Clarissa. They said that Clarissa will be a prominent figure in the future, so that's why they chose her. Hmm...heard that Clar? Not prominent as in....President or anything, but Prominent as in my life. Hmm...something to dwell on. Or maybe it's just coz there's more to Clar that we don't know.

I asked why she said that really weird line. MCR said that that wasn't their doing, it was my own feelings. I KNOW I can't survive without MCR. So yea.

Sheesh. What a dream. What a dream. Then I told MCR that I didn't really want to murder anymore...ok wait I'll tell you what they said.

[hanis]: Murder? Isn't that a bit extreme?
[gerard]: yea. But that's what is hidden inside you. You want to rip them apart.
[hanis]: -casts weary look- Gerard. I thought you hated revenge.
[gerard]: Umhmm. Sorry dear, I was only trying to help. you were really stressed yesterday.
[hanis]: I know.
[gerard]: as lead rains...we'll pass on through... a phantom...forever and ever..
[hanis]: i love that song. Sing more.
[gerard]: A scarecrow...that fuels this flame..is burning...forever and ever...like a bed of roses there's a dozen reasons in this gun.
[hanis]: -smiles- There. Instead of murder you could instead sing to me. You voice is really soothing.
[gerard]: I'm trying...I'm trying...to let you know how much you mean...
-gerard sings until 6 am-
[hanis]: -leans over and kisses everone on the cheek-. Bye guys. Try to be back here again tonight. No murder please. Right now let's pretend words speak louder than actions.
[gerard]: Whatever you say is reality, hanis.
[hanis]: -slings bag over shoulder- all right then. Words ARE louder than actions.
[gerard]: -leans into my ear and whispers- Then there's no need to pretend.