My weekends were not spent in vain.

I went to Malysia on Saturday, and OH JOY; I managed acquire a lovely black traditional Malay suit for Hari Raya. It rocks, I tell you. It's like, black with abstract and random patterns of pink and yellow at the sides, made of chiffon silk, and flares at the end of the sleeve. Well. It SHOULD be nice. It cost 600.

I have TWO suits now, and both are black. My mom is pretty irritated.

Then, on Sunday, it rained. RAIN RAIN oh GLORIOUS rain. I love the smell, the image of the dark green canopy of the tress against the deep-set gray of the sky. I like the way the grass gets moist with water and how my windows mist up in the cold. I like how I can enjoy the chilly breeze of the icy wind while still feeling wrapped up and warm in the safety of my room. I like.

To make things even better, at that particular moment I was indulging myself in hot-fudge chocolate brownies with white bits of chocolate at the top- delicious. It wasn't crispy, but soft, warm, and very VERY VERY chocolatey. Ah.

I found out more about myself. I am a very...precarious person. Careful...balanced. Ok, wait. That sounds confusing. Let me explain. I'm the sort of person who can say I hate black, but if you give me white I'll say no, too. But when I am presented with gray... I won't like it, but I won't hate it either. Balance.

That's how I found out about my mysterious liking for zoning out alone on bus trips. After a whole day of socializing with ppl, I just need to space out for a while, by myself. I don't know WHy, but I have a theory. I think that after a day of letting ppl know, see and hear me, my mind feels like it has been raped. But a good rape. Still, I've always felt safe inside my mind. And that's why bus trips matter a lot to me. It's a time to be on my own, to build castles in the air, (with help from MCR music, of course) and fantasize and dream. I honestly don't mind ppl being with me, but I feel so guilty when I'm not entertaining them that I feel REALLY uncomfortable. So that's why, dear Sharon, I'd prefer you to go home with Jas or someone else. Nothing personal. But it makes me uncomfortable when I don't talk to you...and it makes me uncomfortable when I do. (Balance, remember?) It applies to everyone. Unless my mind feels like it can afford to be raped another hour, then yeah. I'll open my mouth.

And another reason why I like to listen to MCR is because of their lyrics. Okay, so it's majorly BECAUSE of their lyrics. But the thing about that is....it doesn't make sense...sometimes. But after you've gone through a certain...thing, suddenly their lyrics scream bloody truth and you just hang on to it like a lifesaver, coz you know you're not alone. That's why MCR is really looked up to by many ppl. Trust me. I've been there.

And the fact is...They're not very straightforward. They use metaphors, like, a lot, and a couple of similes, so that's how their lyrics are so beautiful and flowy, like a book. It's not like "Hey hey you you I don't like your girlfriend" (don't get me wrong, i like that song) or "Keep your hands off my girl" or summin like that. But MCR will probably be like "You came with a girl from hell, and I don't think the angels like her" or "I'm sorry that you're selectively blind, but can't you see that girl is mine?"

Haha. I'm having fun. Okay. Stop. Before I get carried away.

so. I gotta go.

BTW, I like rain. PiTTER PATTER PITTER PATTEr.

It's raining...it's pouring...the old man is snoring...
He went to bed...bumped his head...and couldn't get up in the morning.....

How come I've never realized how morbid that rhyme was?